HUMOR AND SATIRE | WHAT REALLY HAPPENED


HUMOR AND SATIRE

May 30 10:08

ALTERNATIVE SATURDAY CARTOONS: MAY 30, 2015

Here is another round of Saturday cartoons from Snippits. Enjoy!!! :-)

May 29 11:37

False Flag - The Trailer HD

Webmaster's Commentary: 


Click for larger image


Click for larger image

Bumped to the top in light of the renewed "Wag the ISIS" we are seeing!

FEEL FREE TO COPY AND USE!

May 29 07:23

Lunch With Elvis

Elvis and I had lunch last week. We dined on Sasquatch burgers, fried Unicorn fritters, and we were joined by “the lone gunman.” We had our special luncheon in the main vault room of the Fort Knox Bullion Depository in Kentucky. It was practically empty so converting it to a dining area was relatively easy.

It was a fabulous lunch. It is unfortunate that most of the gold had disappeared, but I suspect that the Chinese value our former gold more than the US ever did.

May 28 10:40

The Bernie Sanders Save the Children Fund

Meet Hanna. Hanna wasn't always hungry – but then Old Spice released its Red Zone Aqua Reef Sweat Defense Solid. Now she’s starving.

"You don't necessarily need a choice of 23 underarm spray deodorants or of 18 different pairs of sneakers when children are hungry in this country." - Sen. Bernie Sanders

May 28 09:56

ISIS TOONS OF THE DAY

New exhibition asked cartoonists to mock ISIS; among the works are cartoons criticizing US and Israel’s ‘help’ in ISIS rise to power.

May 26 10:34

Gag Us with a Spoon: Hillary Selling “Pantsuit” T-Shirts and “Future Voter” Baby Onesies to Finance Campaign

Now everyone can dress just like Hillary… although why any woman would willingly choose to pay to do this to herself is a pitiable mystery, much like that guy who apparently chose to get a Hello Kitty tattoo on his forehead, or actually paying $30 for a kick me sign to put on your own back instead of having cliché junior high bullies do it for you.

(read more)

May 24 21:27

Louis C.K. Learns about the Catholic Church

It's Louis C.K., so that should suffice for the content warning!

May 24 19:23

Canadian sword makers left out of Saudi arms deal

A union representing Canadian sword makers is furious after learning that the Harper government was unable to include Canadian-made swords as part of a $15 billion arms deal recently concluded with Saudi Arabia.

Saudi Arabia is one of the few countries where swords are still actively used for lethal purposes and are not just collectors items. The arms deal with a country famous for carrying out beheadings, was seen by many of Canada’s top sword makers as an opportunity to gain entry into that market.

“It’s really a shame,” said Francois Lafarge, president of CUPE 3000, which represents sword makers. “Saudi Arabia has beheaded 85 individuals this year alone. We really feel the government hung us out to dry on this one.”

May 24 12:04

And it's gone

May 23 12:33

ALTERNATIVE SATURDAY CARTOONS: MAY 22, 2015

Here is another round of Saturday Cartoons from Snippits. Enjoy!!! :-)

May 23 09:05

The way Hillary Clinton’s book is displayed at this D.C. bookstore is the funniest thing you’ll see tonight [photo]

May 22 08:54

Jesus Speaks to The Federal Reserve

May 22 07:59

I'm An Asshole

(just like the Jews)
by Deep Space

May 21 09:20

Pam Geller’s Islamification

May 18 07:52

"Ban 'Em All!!" Do-Gooder proposes Ban On All Harley's In Wake Of Motorcycle Gang Shootout

Ladies and Gentlemen, today we wish to reflect on the horrible incident in Waco Texas this last weekend, the murder of nine and the injury of eighteen more. In retrospect we can see a single common denominator of this vicious act of wanton murder. I'm speaking of course of the Harley Davidson motor cycle. Many weapons were used at Waco, but every one of those criminals rode a Harley. The Harley Davidson motorcycle therefore is the problem. If we think back on every single act of motorcycle gang violence in our country for over a century, we see that in every incident the perpetrators rode a Harley Davidson motorcycle. To any thinking person the solution is simple, ban Harley Davidson motorcycles

May 16 14:25

Reply to a Reader’s Complaint about Anti-American Pro-Russian Bias

I recently received a sharp complaint from a reader about an assumed anti-American pro-Russian bias in my writings. The complaint gives a very good opportunity to address questions on the minds of many in the West confused by an extremely biased pro-Washington, anti-Russian bias in mainstream media coverage of Ukraine and Russia as the new demon to be fought.

First, Mr. Schneider, let me say I am an American and I am definitely not anti-American. I love my country and my fellow Americans.

What I do not love is the clique of very rich who—especially over the past three decades since the time of Reagan and Bush Senior—have step-by-step subverted the American Constitution and its guarantees of citizen rights, have destroyed prudent regulation of the health and safety of American citizens by easing safety rules of the Environmental Protection Agency to benefit companies like DuPont or Monsanto at the expense of the public.

May 16 11:04

ALTERNATIVE SATURDAY CARTOONS: MAY 16, 2015

Here is another round of Saturday Cartoons from Snippits!!! Enjoy!!! :-)

May 16 07:50

5 Reasons to Be Grateful for Monsanto

(Jacob Devaney) We live in a world of contrasting elements and sometimes a direct experience of opposites can help us grow and evolve.

May 14 15:11

NATO Members Drunkenly Sing “We Are the World” (Not Satire)

Have you ever wondered what NATO is up to when they’re not busy overthrowing pesky governments, absorbing post Soviet nations, drone striking terrified villagers, or funding false flag terror plots? I mean, they’re human just like the rest of us right? Surely they need to take a break from their murderous campaigns from time to time. Sometimes they just need to take a step back from it all, put their arms around each other and just sing, you know?

May 14 10:10

batman

May 13 10:37

The Champion Of Anal Probes: The TSA Or The Aliens?

Deep Space's video

May 13 08:43

A to Zion - The Definitive Israeli Lexicon - Gilad Atzmon & Enzo Apicella

May 12 17:41

A to Zion - The Definitive Israeli Lexicon IS OUT!!!

Buy it now before it is banned!!!

May 09 10:34

ALTERNATIVE SATURDAY CARTOONS: MAY 9, 2015

Another round of Alternative Saturday Cartoons from Snippits. Enjoy!!! :-)

May 08 11:23

Russian Tanks in the White House?

Check this out: a group of Russian students have somehow projected footage of the Victory Day parade on the White House. They called their project “polite tanks” and they explained that “if Barack does not want to come to the parade, the parade will come to him”. I love it!

May 07 20:26

Giggles the pig running for mayor of Flint, Michigan

Vote in the Swine and we'll all be fine. Vote Pig!You dig!

FLINT, Mich., May 7 (UPI) -- A Michigan pig named Giggles is "putting the pork back in government" by running for mayor of Flint.

May 07 19:26

Police Responding to Home Invasion Call Shoot Home's Resident

OH! My God! A black guy with a gun. Shoot!

Police who were dispatched to a home invasion in South Carolina shot the resident, who now has "life-threatening" injuries, the Charleston County Sheriff's Office said today.

May 06 19:14

Transniggeraphobe?

How ridiculous our PC distraction culture has become

May 05 12:47

Gilad Atzmon 2015 May Book Tour

From tomorrow I will be visiting many cities all over the US signing a new book I co-wrote with legendary cartoonist Enzo Apicella (A to Zion- The Definitive Israeli Lexicon- out on May 27th). A lot of controversy to follow...Books will be available for purchase ahead of publication at the events.

The first event is, Tomorrow, Wednesday May 6, NYC. An historic dialogue between ultra orthodox Rabbi Yaakov Shapiro and yours truly:

Please spread the message and come and bring your friends

May 04 09:14

Gilad in the USA- May 15th

I will be visiting many cities all over the US in the next 3 weeks signing a new book I co-wrote with Enzo Apicella (A to Zion- The Definitive Israeli Lexicon- out on May 27th). Controversy to follow...Books will be available for purchase ahead of publication at the events.

The first event is on Wednesday i May 6, NYC. An historic dialogue between ultra orthodox Rabbi Yaakov Shapiro and yours truly:

Please spread the message and come and bring your friends

Webmaster's Commentary: 

Gilad sent me an early copy of the book, and without going into details it is very funny! I will be having him back on the show Thursday to discuss it.

May 03 11:43

Flashback: George on George: An Interview With George Carlin

A comprehensive interview with the iconic comedian George Carlin. He recounts his early career from childhood dreams of becoming an actor like Danny Kaye all the way up to his 1960?s transformation into a leading voice of the counterculture and then he details the evolution of his writing and finding his true voice on stage in the 1990?s. For Carlin fans the final ten minutes is remarkably touching as he chokes up discussing plans he was forming to star in a one man Broadway show which never came to be and then reflects over his successful career and how wonderfully fulfilling his life has been.

May 02 20:19

ALTERNATIVE SATURDAY CARTOONS: MAY 2, 2015

Another round of Saturday Cartoons from Snippets. . . Enjoy!!! :-)

May 02 09:05

The Great Big ISIS Movie Extravaganza Part VIII

May 01 08:14

Muslims Strike Back! launch campaign lampooning anti-muslim ads

An “Islamic frittata” campaign lampooning a conservative firebrand’s anti-Muslim posters is set to debut in city subways Tuesday.Documentary filmmakers Negin Farsad and Dean Obeidallah say they will post 144 posters in 140 subway stations thanks to roughly $20,000 raised through crowdfunding. The posters bear messages like: “The ugly truth about Muslims: Muslims have great frittata recipes.”

Apr 29 11:05

HTC One M9 Ad Parodies Anti-Depressant Commercials

Apr 28 08:49

Jon Stewart rips CNN for ignoring Baltimore protests to cover the White House Correspondents’ Dinner

Jon Stewart had some choice words for CNN, which spent Saturday night hovering over the red carpet for the White House Correspondents’ Dinner and talking about Lena Dunham–while only forty miles away, Baltimore was torn apart by violent protests over the death of 25-year-old Freddie Gray.

“Why are we watching this meaningless circle jerk?” Stewart demanded.

Apr 27 19:36

Jello Biafra: Shut Up! Be Happy!

. . . . the comfort you've demanded is now mandatory . . .

Apr 27 10:39

ABC7 TV Eyewitness News reporter asked about the "Dancing Israelis"

When a local KABC TV news crew interviewed me about a local jewelry store crash & grab heist near Los Angeles, I thought I'd have some fun with it. So after their interview I conducted a brief interview of my own, and asked the reporter if he ever heard of another group of bandits who were the only people arrested in New York City on September 11, 2001: The Dancing Israelis!

Apr 27 10:38

POSTERS FOR HILLARY 2016

Over the last few weeks I cranked up photoshop and started going through images of old classic movie posters, having fun modifying them for Hillary's coming campaign. For some reason my ideas were rejected by her campaign staff, so I am posting them here. These are a work in progress. More to come. Feel free to use and have fun with them!

Webmaster's Commentary: 


I received a lot of emails about these so I am bumping them to the top.

Optional Banner: 
WRH Exclusive
Apr 26 14:40

Hillary's Banned Words

Apr 25 16:54

ALTERNATIVE SATURDAY CARTOONS: APRIL 25, 2015

Here is another round of Saturday cartoons from Snippits!!

Enjoy!!! :-)

Apr 22 09:45

Honest Political Ads - Gil Fulbright for Senate

Apr 22 07:36

Hillary: The President America Deserves

“It’s time” for Hillary, and who can disagree? It doesn’t matter that no one who isn’t being paid to say it sincerely believes she can lead the country. She is precisely what the American system is designed to produce.

Mencken said of American government:

“All the odds are on the man who is, intrinsically, the most devious and mediocre—the man who can most adeptly disperse the notion that his mind is a virtual vacuum. The Presidency tends, year by year, to go to such men. As democracy is perfected, the office represents, more and more closely, the inner soul of the people. We move toward a lofty ideal. On some great and glorious day the plain folks of the land will reach their heart's desire at last, and the White House will be adorned by a downright moron.”

Apr 21 13:19

And it's gone

Apr 21 08:44

Parody: What Food Ads Would Really Say (If They Were Honest)

You've seen the industry-sponsored propaganda about how wonderful the ingredients they put in your food. But what would the ads say if they really told you what went into your groceries?

Apr 18 12:45

Paedophiles busy practising dementia symptoms

MP for Wirral West, Simon Williams, who is one of those accused said, “My memory has become very selective, unfortunately.”

“The carers will assist me to wash and dress and point me in the direction of parliament, yet I am still able to fill in my expense forms entirely unaided.”

“It’s probably time for me to go into a care home. I’ve heard the House of Lords is very nice.”

Meanwhile, a Downing Street spokesman confirmed that David Cameron was unable to attend last night’s leaders debate after he was found wandering around Waitrose with a tea cosy on his head.

Apr 17 07:55

An Unnecessary (One Hopes) Defense Of Wikipedia's Honour

Probably NSFW somehow. Backstory links at source.

To everyone who thinks there is something scandalous about investing the profit made from a legal business (soft core pornography is legal), and turning that into -- something as wonderful as Wikipedia:

Apr 15 22:35

Michelle Bachmann: Obama's poor relationship with Israel will bring the return of Jesus

Oh! Lord! Sorry.

Former Republican congresswoman Michele Bachmann stated that President Barack Obama’s handling of the Iranian nuclear deal is a symbol of the coming of the end of times and the “imminent” return of Jesus Christ, during a recent radio interview.

Bachmann explained that if Obama and the United States turn their back on Israel, this would bring severe “curses” upon the United States, similar to those seen in the end of days.

Apr 13 17:36

Rowers Attacked By Flying Asian Carp 2015

Published on Apr 10, 2015

Washington University in St. Louis freshman men's crew team gets attacked by giant Asian Carp during a Friday morning practice at Creve Coeur Lake.

See additional videos for "Rowers Strike Back"

Apr 12 09:08

TIMELY TOON ~~ OBAMA’S ‘OK CORRAL’

OK For Everyone EXCEPT Israel

Apr 11 10:18

ALTERNATIVE SATURDAY CARTOONS: APRIL 11, 2015

Here is another round of Saturday Cartoons from Snippits!!! Enjoy!!! :)

Apr 09 09:19

Avoid Becoming a Patsy like Dzhokar Tsarnaev

by Henry Makow, Ph.D.

Modern life presents some unique challenges. STD's. Student loans. Gender bending etc. None is greater than the danger of becoming a patsy. This short article shows you how to avoid becoming the target of a massive, televised manhunt, and being vilified and butchered in the process.

Apr 08 10:40

JON STEWART EXPLAINS THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN EASTER AND PASSOVER

Stewart urged his fellow Jews to “take it up a notch” when it comes to youth marketing. After all, it’s not like the story of Passover is totally uncool. “Moses parting the Red Sea? How have we not turned that into an amusement park?” he wondered.

Most critically, Passover could really use a make-believe character to rival the Easter Bunny. To that end, Stewart proposed “Passover Pete, the guitar-playing, pizza-eating lion.”

Apr 08 08:34

Dilbert Explains Economics And Economists!

All of that said this Dilbert cartoon attempts to clarify the field of economics and let me preface it first it by saying that in no way is it meant as a knock on economists (okay maybe just a little).

Apr 07 15:23

Faithful dog lies down with companions as they’re arrested

A drug raid in the Brazilian state of Santa Catarina turned up some drugs, guns and one faithful dog. The photo, which has since gone viral in Brazil, shows the suspects – and apparently their companion as well – surrendering to authorities during the raid.

Apr 06 08:48

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: Government Surveillance (HBO)

Apr 05 08:42

TIMELY TOON ~~ THE SECRET ORIGIN OF THE EASTER BUNNY

Webmaster's Commentary: 

Looks vaguely familiar!

Apr 04 10:45

ALTERNATIVE SATURDAY CARTOONS: APRIL 4, 2015

Another round of Saturday cartoons from Snippits!!! Enjoy!!!

Apr 03 22:26

Man, 28, arrested over 'cake slice attack'

Those Scots! They can turn a cake slice into an improvised weapon.

A YOUNG man was arrested after allegedly assaulting another man with a CAKE SLICE.

Apr 02 09:44

TODAY’S TOON ~~ #JeSuisPresidentObama

How the extreme Israeli right sees the US President

Apr 01 08:04

Russian strategist suggests nuking Yellowstone

The best way for Russia to solve its problem with America would be to trigger a nuclear weapon at Yellowstone National Park and hope it would set off a supervolcano, destroying the continent, according to the chief of a Russian think tank.

Webmaster's Commentary: 

I assume this is an April Fool's joke!

Mar 31 11:30

Questionable tweets by new 'Daily Show' host Noah draw fire

A day after Trevor Noah was declared the new host of "The Daily Show," complete with the blessing of the exiting Jon Stewart, graphic tweets targeting women, Jews and Middle America are causing a social media backlash.

By Tuesday, Trevor Noah was a trending topic on Twitter as he drew fire for jokes described as tasteless, hateful — and unfunny. Roseanne Barr was among those calling out the 31-year-old South African comic, who has an international following and two million Twitter followers.

"U should cease sexist & anti semitic 'humor' about jewish women & Israel," she tweeted late Monday.

Mar 30 10:33

The Americans With No Abilities Act of 2015 – [PARODY]

While this is just a joke, based on what we’ve seen come out of Washington D.C. the past few years it’s not all that far fetched:

Mar 30 10:21

Panhandler Party

Mar 30 09:25

Jon Stewart Mocks US Joining Up With Iran: We're 'Punching Ourselves In The D*ck'

Mar 30 07:24

CERN scientists discover elusive "Obama particle" which destroys economies on contact (satire)

In a stunning breakthrough that's sure to result in dozens of Nobel Prizes being awarded to somebody, scientists at the CERN Large Hadron Collider have discovered the elusive "Obama particle" by slamming the U.S. economy into a brick wall at 99.999% of the speed of a derivatives flash crash.

The collision produced an elaborate pattern of joblessness and wealth destruction which was captured and mapped by CERN scientists to create a statistical detection model that pinpointed the elusive Obama particle's role in destroying everything it touches.

"We believe this Obama particle may be the fundamental destructive force behind anti-matter and dark matter all at once," said one scientist who asked not to be named. "It seems to be capable of destroying everything it encounters."

Mar 28 08:03

The Last Ever Top Gear

Mar 27 07:55

Tom Lehrer - So Long, Mom (A Song for World War III)

Mar 24 09:59

TODAY’S TOON ~~ NETANYAHU’S MESSAGE TO OBAMA

‘You wanna reopen the ‘Peace Process’? Just send 30 BILLION DOLLAR$ in unmarked bills in a brown paper bag …

My address remains the same.’

Mar 24 07:31

Parody: Ted Cruz for President 2016!!!

Okay, this video we made is total parody just like our sham presidential elections are every four years.

“If you want more of the same… I’m Ted Cruz.”

Senator Ted Cruz has officially announced his campaign for president… oooh, gosh diddly, are you excited at all the cheesy electioneering to come?

We decided to make our own Ted Cruz presidential bid video because the one he produced is literally vomit and/or cringe-inducing. Who is buying that ridiculous tripe? Did he actually go get the “In a world” movie trailer guy to do the voice at the end?

Mar 24 06:22

Ted Cruz for President 2016!!! - PARODY

Mar 23 08:22

Media Lies: Rinse and Repeat OFTEN

featuring Alex Jones, Sandy Hook Gene Rosen + more

Mar 20 11:44

VIDEO: The Daily Show With Jon Stewart On Netanyahu Win

Jon Stewart is warning Israeli Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu that he might be facing a lawsuit... over stealing our election strategies.

Mar 20 10:30

FIRST DAY OF SPRING! - Tom Lehrer - Poisoning Pigeons In The Park

Mar 19 13:12

Magic Obama Logic: Mandatory Voting = Good, Mandatory Voter IDs = Bad and Racist

It’s being reported that Obama recently went on record that he believes the U.S. should have mandatory voting. An interesting stance, wouldn’t you say, considering he’s staunchly against mandatory voter ID laws.

In fact, his latest pick for Attorney General to replace Eric Holder went on the record that mandatory voter ID laws are all fueled by, what else? Racism.

So…mandatory voter laws = good, but mandatory voter ID = bad and racist? How exactly does that work again?

Mar 19 10:09

Awkward: CBS Talking Head Accuses Radio Host Of Being White And Co-Opting Black Culture: “I’m Actually Black”

Ouch. This is actually kinda hard to watch... unless you find it easy to watch video of someone getting their butt handed to them.

Mar 19 10:04

Propaganda Alert: NYT Tries to Make Jeb Bush Look Cool with Puff Piece About Him Meeting Rapper Ludacris

This is not the first time NYT got caught bending over for Jeb Bush and Co. Back in October the outlet wrote the fawning Bush piece, “The Bushes, Led by W., Rally to Make Jeb ‘45’” and, oddly, did not allow comments so no one could rank or comment on the story whatsoever.

Then again, propaganda is one thing, but when it becomes this painfully obvious, it just hurts.

Mar 19 07:12

Andy Griffith Vs. the Partiot Act

Sheriff Andy teaching Opie about the 4th amendment and the due process of law after Opie eavesdrops on a private conversation.

Andy Samuel Griffith was an American actor,

Mar 17 22:47

RIP Internet Explorer (1995-2015). We Knew Ye All Too Well

Microsoft Internet Explorer, a browser familiar to many and loved by few, passed away today after a long illness. It was 19 years old.

Bowing to the inevitable, Microsoft admitted today that it had decided to remove IE from life support. (IE will, however, continue to receive tech support through at least 2016.) IE is survived by Windows, Office, and the Microsoft Mouse.

Mar 17 15:25

Putin May Be Back, But These #WhereIsPutin Tweets Are Still Hilarious

I can’t decide which one is my favorite, the rainbow unicorn or the militarized hummingbird?

Mar 17 11:37

Commission Receives Complaints About Human Rights Situation In The US, Venezuela And Ecuador

Migrant agricultural workers in a field of California.
The Inter-American Commission on Human Rights (IACHR) held on Tuesday the second day of the 154 session and receive reports, among others, on the situation of the right to freedom of expression in Ecuador, forced migration and persecution of community advocates LGBTI in Central America, and the situation of economic, social and cultural rights in Venezuela.

Also receive reports on Chile, Peru, Paraguay and Haiti. The period ends on 20 March. On Monday, the Commission received complaints about the “serious impact” on human rights in the draft canal in Nicaragua, lack of guarantees during trials in military courts Guantanamo Bay (Cuba) and job discrimination against immigrant’s undocumented immigrants in the United States.

http://whatisusa.info/commission-receives-complaints-about-human-right...

Mar 17 10:03

BACK TO THE UPCOMING US ELECTION ~~ IN COMICS

Now that the Israeli Election is finally taking place today, here’s a look at the US Election Campaign …

Mar 16 15:05

IN COMICS ~~ THE ISRAELI ELECTION CAMPAIGN

Mar 16 07:07

Poroshenko's Anti-Crisis Plan Leaked

Webmaster's Commentary: 

Translation: The Presidential Administration of Ukraine

Anti-Crisis Plan:

1. Take out a loan.
2. Take out a loan.
3. Take out a loan.
4. Take out a loan.
5. F*** up everything.
6. Buy a ticket to London.

Signed: Poroshenko, President of Ukraine

Mar 15 15:04

Boston Marathon Bombing Hoax Trial Of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev

Barf News From Mainstream Media: Boston Marathon Bombing Hoax Trial Of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev
Pop your popcorn and grab your favorite beverage. Inform yourself via Yahoo.com Tabloid News about the fake Boston Marathon Bombing Trial of Dzhokhar Tsarnaev. Admire the crisis actor artist sketches of the trial. No need to view any trial video, as past video footage of the hoax bombing was all you needed to evoke your Hollywood movie emotions.

Stay tuned to mainstream media tabloid-type news. Rely on Yahoo entertainment news to echo the snake belly lies of crisis actor “testimony.” And, be reminded that this “live coverage” highlights crisis actor (people) sketches and a contrived news script that is second to none.

Mar 14 10:52

SNIPPITS AND SNAPPITS - Alternative Saturday Cartoons March 14, 2015

Here is another round of Saturday cartoons from Snippits. Enjoy!!!

Mar 14 10:32

Congress's Approval Rating No Longer Detectable by Current Technology

After a challenging week for the legislative body, the approval rating of the United States Congress has shrunk to a point where it is no longer detectable by the technology currently available, a leading pollster said on Friday.

Mar 14 08:27

Netanyahu Assures Critics He Still Has Utmost Respect For U.S. Money

In a concerted effort to ease growing tensions between the two nations, Israeli prime minister Benjamin Netanyahu assured his critics Monday that he still has the utmost respect for U.S. money. “Relations between our two countries have at times been strained, but I promise you all that the entire Israeli government, myself included, still holds a high opinion of the United States’ cash,” said Netanyahu, emphasizing that his speech to Congress was not intended to show any disrespect for American funding whatsoever.

Mar 14 06:23

redacted tonight - homeless bill of rights

why racoons have more rights than homeless people
why it is illegal to ask for a handout while the government showers tax money on corporations and the military-industrial-espionage-prison state

Mar 13 20:25

Hilarious Video: Anti-Gun Group Epically Fails At Mocking Second Amendment

An anti-gun group released a video yesterday mocking the Second Amendment, but the video is so bad, it’s hilarious to watch.

Mar 13 08:56

DC Matic: The Hillary-Approved Email Server!

Mar 12 08:50

The Daily Show With Jon Stewart Under Miner

Mar 12 05:59

Obama’s OFA FAIL: ‘85% of 8th Graders Believe in Man-Made Climate Change, Too Bad Only Half the Senate Agrees’

So… eighth graders are now the scientific standard for policy decision making in this country? Gotta love these responses, too.

Mar 12 04:22

Air Force Launches ‘Virtual Work’ Mobile App

“Call me old-fashioned, but I used to live for the days when we’d gather around the espresso machine after breakfast and start making plans for lunch. Now I actually have to repeatedly click on mission buttons called ‘Send Email’ and ‘Present PowerPoint.’”

Mar 10 13:53

You had one job!!

ONE OF MY FAV TWITTER FEEDS

Mar 10 09:35

Harvard University Sent Out A Rejection Letter That Is Pure Gold

Harvard gets many applications every year. Everyone wants to attend their school but few get selected. The person who submitted this application thought he had it in the bag, but Harvard shut him down with authority.

Mar 09 14:25

Daylight Saving Time - How Is This Still A Thing?

Last Week Tonight with John Oliver: (HBO)

Mar 09 09:29

Benjamin Netanyahu - Stand! Down! Iran (Noy Alooshe Remix)

Webmaster's Commentary: 

BUMP TO THE TOP

Mar 09 06:37

President's Enemy List

HUMOR

Mar 08 12:45

Frank Zappa > I AM THE SLIME

> Saturday Night Live 1975
I am gross and perverted
I'm obsessed 'n deranged
I have existed for years
But very little has changed
I'm the tool of the Government
And industry too
For I am destined to rule
And regulate you

Mar 07 15:40

Scary! Putin doesn't just ride horses bare chested......

He is now known to have hitched a bare chested ride on a wild weasel-pecker too.

https://twitter.com/MoscowTimes/status/572725096370065408/photo/1

No wonder NATO generals lay awake at night scared shitless thinking of what this man might try next.

Mar 07 09:27

Hitler vs Hillary

Mar 06 16:31

Never fly Solo, Han! From Wookies to weasels, internet users post series of memes in tribute to Harrison Ford’s heroism in plane crash

Brian Williams says he’s a little banged up after the Harrison Ford plane crash, but he’ll be okay.

Mar 06 15:15

RT Must Be Punished for Its Warmongering, Lies and Child Abuse Cover-Ups

From propagating lies about Libya, to airing tributes to pedophiles—It's time for UK's media regulator to kick RT off the air.

Mar 06 08:47

Video: Funny Isis parody

Mar 05 11:18

Remote-Controlled Cockroaches: Coming Sooner Than You Think To 'Protect' That Hard-To-Spy-Upon Urban Ghetto

Original post.

But why send in a roach? Is not the 'Internet of Things' likely going to be treasure trove enough? One would think the seemingly endless metadata, streaming with our implied consent (did you read that Terms of Service carefully?) from every little electronic device now taken for granted in our day-to-day lives, would be able to provide more than enough details to make it trivial for supercomputers to reconstruct our every move in real time -- like the DEA is already doing for all cars on US roads...

Hyperlinks (including to a DIY roach robot kit) and video at source.

Mar 04 16:39

Conservative campus paper warned over satirizing terrorists

No student or student group at a public university should have to fight for their First Amendment rights. But as I’m preparing for graduation in a few short months, that’s exactly what I find myself doing—fighting for the rights of my student publication.

Mar 04 13:52

Putin Killed Nemtzov - undeniable proof!

Mar 04 12:36

Jon Stewart: Bibi’s Congress Reception Was ‘Longest Blowjob a Jewish Man Has Ever Received’

Jon Stewart tonight wrung some comedy out of Benjamin Netanyahu‘s speech to Congress, mocking it as a “Festival of Slights” to President Obama.

Mar 04 12:24

Bibi's Big Adventure - Comedy Central Original

Mar 04 06:53

Bibi at Congress: A Fantasia

Prime Minister Benjamin Netanyahu looked out over the gathered members of Congress today. "You are my harem," the Israeli leader said, "and I am your sultan. I could pluck any one of you out and bring back to my tent, adorn you in silk, and ask you if you're grateful that you get the privilege to suck the sultan's cock. You, there, Senator Tom Cotton, part your lips and smoke the cream pipe of paradise. Darrell Issa, your tongue looks ready to wash the leathery folds of the sultan's orb sack. Don't crowd, my concubines. I will bless each of you when my jism geyser is ready to erupt. Each of you will receive the gift of the sultan's pearls on your faces."

The concubines were joyous, especially because the sultan would be showing that foul Moor who presumed to lead them the proper way to take care of a harem. "The sultan thinks we're special," declared the oldest, scabbiest concubine. "I hope he is most pleased with how we pleasure him."

Mar 03 15:52

DHS Terror Alert! Known Terrorist and War Criminal In US!

SEE SOMETHING, SAY SOMETHING

Mar 03 14:14

Video: Student Loans Are Like STDs (Everyone Is Catching Them)

Student loan debt is the next big economic sledgehammer that's about to come down on this country...the next big bubble to burst following the housing bubble.

Consider this. Student loan debt is somewhere upwards of $1.3 Trillion in this country these days — and that's just the official government loans, not private lenders, etc. The Congressional Budget Office is estimating that's going to double in the next decade as tuition rises and more people go back and get even more loans, going to grad school in the hope that if they take on even more debt and get another degree, maybe they'll finally be able to get that magical job where they can afford to live to be debt free one day to match it... a condition known these days as "American Dream Syndrome."

Mar 01 08:07

The Emperor’s Nuke Clothes

Feb 28 09:48

US MSM has already created a composite sketch of #Nemtsov's killer

Feb 24 18:07

ISIS Is Back With A Super-Duper Scary Training Video To Intimidate Western Infidels

Feb 21 09:07

How to Talk Australians - Episode 1: ‘G’DAY KNACKERS’

Feb 19 07:30

BREAKING! LATEST VIDEO FROM "ISIS!"

Feb 18 07:55

An "A.S.S.H.O.L.E." Will Be Everywhere, Promises President Obama

President Obama today signed into law the "America's Secret Services Helping Our Liberties Endure" act, or ASSHOLE.

"This much needed piece of legislation will give us the tools we need to place an ASSHOLE on nearly every street corner, making our great country impervious to another 9/11," said the president, adding "There will be an ASSHOLE on your cell phone, an ASSHOLE monitoring your ISP and many more ASSHOLE's in our schools, work places and other public meeting places where al Qaeda types can and do flourish."

"We must endure a few privations, such as temporarily suspending the Bill of Rights in our never-ending struggle against those who attacked us on 9/11, but no freedom loving American will object to that small sacrifice to help us prevent al Qaeda or IS or aL Nusra from again striking the homeland."

Feb 15 10:47

George Carlin on Global Warming

Feb 12 10:47

If The News Was Forced to Tell the Truth

For the same reason grocery stores make you walk 20 minutes to find the milk, news outlets are in a constant competition to find the most indirect route to the information that you actually need to know. We asked you to show us what it might look like if they were forced to tell you the plain truth. The winner is below, but first the runners up ...

Feb 12 07:15

Arrest Punxsutawney Phil, Suggests New Hampshire Police Department

On Tuesday, the Merrimack Police Department in Merrimack, New Hampshire, announced that an arrest warrant was out for Punxsutawney Phil, the rodent who recently predicted the country would see six more weeks of winter. The public notice was posted on the police department’s Facebook page.

“We have received several complaints from the public that this little varmint is held up in a hole, warm and toasty,” the post reads. “He told several people that Winter would last 6 more weeks, however he failed to disclose that it would consist of mountains of snow!”

Webmaster's Commentary: 

Ah, the New England sense of humor! I miss it!

Feb 10 14:32

White House Petition - Provide kneepads to all Congressmen to prevent injury while groveling at the speech of Israeli Prime Minister Netanyahu

Most congressmen are elderly and such frequent groveling may cause injuries which can be easily prevented by the provision of kneepads.

Further, as all congressmen receive health care subsidized 100% by taxpayers, the prevention of groveling-related injuries benefits public finances.

Feb 09 07:33

Kremlin-Funded Study Says Obama Is a Space Lizard

The Internet nearly exploded yesterday after it was revealed that a Pentagon "movement patterns analysis expert" concluded—after carefully studying video footage—that Vladimir Putin has an "autistic disorder."

But the study's spectacular findings pale in comparison to similar research funded by the Kremlin, which has clearly demonstrated that Barack Obama is a lizard from outer space.

Feb 07 08:19

Brian Williams lost a leg in the Spanish American War.

He also died for 22 minutes on Omaha Beach.
Fell through the ice at Chosin Reservoir.
We owe that fucker a lot.

Feb 06 13:14

Jordanian Army Crossing syria Border to Fight ISIS

Feb 06 07:35

The Fact-Checked Adventures of Brian Williams

Feb 06 07:27

Pentagon Study Concludes Putin Is Autistic, of Course - US military scientists also concluded that Putin is not properly vaccinated

Astute news consumers already know that Demon-Czar Vladimir Putin has an unquenchable thirst for orphan blood. But according to a Pentagon study recently unearthed from a dumpster behind the US Naval War College, Putin also has...Asperger's syndrome.

Feb 03 15:29

It's Putin's devilish cloak-tank!

The world has long puzzled over how Putin has managed to invade Ukraine without us being able to find any credible satellite photos, tire tracks, or tank tracks in the fields, or spent shell casings, or bodies of Russian soldiers. But one whistleblower (ein Wistleblower!—tr) from the Russian internal secret service (FSB) has now unveiled the weapons of the arsenal of dread from Putin’s Chamber of Terror.

Feb 03 11:13

Stephen Fry on God | The Meaning Of Life

Jan 26 10:44

The REAL Terror Threat

Why isn’t Homeland Security going after public enemy number 1?

Jan 25 10:15

If Disney Princesses Were Real

Jan 23 10:33

Time to Cut the Bull

Jan 22 11:17

NSA Public Service Announcement

Jan 21 11:32

How to find dirt cheap, long term parking in the heart of London

Jan 21 11:21

New Ukrainian Bicycles to hit Stores next month

Jan 21 08:46

Clear As Mud: In Case You’re Confused About What’s Going On In The Middle East…

If the people we want to defeat are defeated, they might be replaced by people we like even less. And, all this was started by us invading a country to drive out terrorists who weren’t actually there until we went in to drive them out – do you understand now?

Jan 20 15:43

Bibi’s Big Brainstorm

Jan 20 10:23

‘Most convincing evidence’: Russian embassy trolls NATO with toy tanks

The Twitter account @RussEmbassyUAE, which is the official Twitter of the Russian Embassy in the United Arab Emirates, posted a picture of tiny toy trucks, tanks and armored vehicles all lined up on the ground, with the words: “#NATO's latest evidence of #Russian armor invading #Ukraine has been leaked! Seems to be the most convincing ever!”

Jan 20 09:40

5 Awful Lessons I Learned Living With a Mystery Illness

Having a chronic, potentially life-threatening illness is terrible, which is why we call it "chronic illness" and not "chronic victory." Luckily, medical science has advanced to such a point over the years that, for the most part, you can go to a doctor to get your symptoms diagnosed and treated with a minimal amount of leeching.

But what if you were violently, persistently ill, and not a single doctor in the country had any idea what was wrong with you? That's what happened to Thomas Wolfe, who suffered from an extremely rare disease that took four damn years to correctly diagnose. We tend to think that modern medicine has identified every possible disease a person can catch, but as we learned when we talked to Mr. Wolfe about his experience, that assumption is dangerously, hilariously far from the truth:

Jan 19 11:18

FROM DREAM TO NIGHTMARE IN IMAGES

Jan 16 07:21

RUSSIAN TANK CROSSES INTO UKRAINE!!!

Jan 14 11:17

Play Israeli Youths’ Hilarious New “Push the Bibi” Video Game!

In the age of the political gaffe, how could Israeli PM Bibi Netanyahu’s now-notorious push to the front of the memorial march in Paris last week not turn heads? Fellow Israelis did a collective facepalm and chided him for presenting “the pushy Israeli, the impolite Israeli” to the world during a moment of global mourning for the Charlie Hebdo cartoonists and hostages killed in Paris.

But few went as far as the as-yet-unnamed young creators of “Push the Bibi,” a fun-poking arcade-style game that lets you navigate the Prime Minister to the front of the march. Featuring an image of Bibi wearing a crown, flanked by an Israeli and French flag, the game feels a little like midtown Manhattan during rush hour, but with a layer of bad PR. If your Bibi reaches the coveted spot between Angela Merkel and Ibrahim Keita, the game announces “Game over! Don’t try again.”

Jan 10 15:38

JE SUIS MOI ...

Jan 08 08:06

25 Highly Visible Benefits Of Being An Irrational Social Justice Warrior

In response to the “25 invisible benefits of gaming while male” SJW propaganda video, here are 25 highly visible benefits of being an irrational Social Justice Warrior.

Jan 06 14:30

Hot off the nonpress: The Khazarian Sex Predator Gene May Soon Be Found

Professor Yehuda Kosher from Be’er Chosen University, Israel, announced today that he and his team may be close to uncovering the JNA (Jewish DNA) and may be able to isolate the Khazarian Sex Predator (KSP) gene.

Professor Kosher, Israel’s leading evolutionary psychoarcheologist and a renown advocate of applied Eugenics told The Jewish Scientific Daily (JSD) that the apparent physical resemblance between Woody Alan and Alan Dershowitz’s facial features gives new hope for a scientific break through.

Jan 06 10:27

INDIA/PAKISTAN BORDER CROSSING SPOOF

Jan 06 08:00

EXODUS: GODS AND KINGS - The Abridged Script

CHRISTIAN BALE
Me? Oh fuck. It's pretty sad that "Epic Rap Battles of History" has a more convincing Moses than me.

DIRECTOR RIDLEY SCOTT
(actual quote)
I can't mount a film of this budget...and say my lead actor is Mohammad so-and-so from such-and-such.

CHRISTIAN BALE
Really? You couldn't find any black or Middle Eastern actors to lead this film? Not Denzel Washington, Laurence Fishburne or Morgan Freeman? Are you saying people wouldn't line up for miles to see Samuel L. Jackson scream "Let my people fucking go!"

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